It’s been a short while since I’ve posted anything on this blog that is yoga related and about my own personal yoga journey. I felt like I just wanted to share with you a few photos from my time in Bulgaria practicing some yoga whilst we were on day trips as well as some thoughts and life reflections I have already been discussing with my partner. First of all, I don’t know if you have noticed but I am a lot calmer than I used to be. In previous posts and in articles I was a woman ablaze with anger seeking justice and respect for my life choices whilst encouraging others to stand up for what they believe in too. But now I am beginning to see the fruits of my labour and people can see all my hard work is slowly paying off, the critics have nothing to be critical about and so I am left in peace to do what I want and it feels marvelous to explore my life without feeling weighed down by judgement. I personally detest unwanted meddling masked as advice, I enjoy constructive feedback when I ask the person I feel is appropriate for the advice but other than that I’m extremely headstrong and will reject opinions I never wanted in the first place, which can make me appear rude and abrupt to the person who is rudely telling me how to live my life (without my consent) Oh the Irony!
I personally don’t understand the need to be negative and critical of others, to me its a waste of good energy and really emphasizes how mean an individual is at their core and then I question why that person ended up like this? A kind of bitter resentment for their own life that they have to crap on other’s choices and journeys?
“…Even Patanjali understood that the human brain does not compute negative instructions or negativity in general and so in his teachings of the yoga sutras he doesn’t bother with any form of negativity at all. In the world we live in, there is a huge emphasis on criticism, but yoga and yoga philosophy does not bother with that and Patanjali’s yoga sutras has a complete lack of negative construction because he believed in the power of building people up, not knocking them down. The Yoga Sutras encourage us to have awareness, be mindful and allow ourselves to deploy energy and resources skillfully. The Yamas and Niyamas are active principles that can help us in our daily life to foster harmony, cohesion and integration in all we do…”– James Boag, Spectrum Magazine 2017.
So with that in mind, my partner and I have been discussing the near future together (no we are not engaged). We love traveling, he loves working on his travel photography and videography and I want to have the freedom to teach wherever I want, I don’t want to be confined to work like the part time retail job I have now, it’s suffocating me, one work colleague once said to me “You are not like the rest of us, you can’t live in a cage”. I’ve made the decision to go and do a 200hr yoga teacher training with either Samma Karuna in Koh Phangan Thailand because they offer a discount on the training if you do a month of seva yoga with a charity associated with them or Sadhana yoga school in Bali because they offer scholarships to those with low incomes (and I fall in that category) and then eventually go on to specialize in Yin Yoga and Thai Yoga Massage. This will be a slow process because I really don’t earn much, but I have hope, patience and an Oxen-like determination.
People can criticize me all they want for my decision, I am OK with it now, I realize their negativity is deep rooted and a projection of their own ideas of how the world works, it’s their illusion. I also choose to be positive & proactive because I know I have good intentions and I am a humanitarian, this decision to do these trainings goes beyond myself, I can’t be an activist who is part of the global change if I am stuck serving selfish consumers throwing tantrums because the product they want is not in stock, if I stayed in that reality for the sake of comfort, pleasing the critics and money; my soul’s purpose will be wasted. Something bigger than me is gently pushing me to do great things, to teach others there is more to life than the lies the media spoon feeds us, to be of service in schools, youth centres, refugee camps, homeless shelters and perhaps even the NHS? I have so much to offer because I have a big heart, pure intentions and now I acknowledge my self worth so I am actively giving myself the unconditional love I deserve and as my Nanna used to say “You can’t love others until you love yourself first.”
Everything I have done up to this point has been with love. I created this blog from the ground up out of love for many things, I worked my butt off in a part time retail job to fund my studies and training so I can have skills and build a career I love, I’ve saved money in order to travel, not for the sake of holidays but to learn about other cultures, I’ve written articles for the love of writing and sharing knowledge and I am now teaching workshops because I love helping people and being a bridge who can guide them to love themselves and I want to continue being a vessel of love and grow as a person in order to cultivate more love to share and if critics have a problem with that I’m just going to carry on being me, that’s all I can do to counteract the pessimism. And I will go on proving that living a life of love and integrity feels far better than living a gloomy life of resentment, jealousy, boredom and cynicism.
So right now in my life I can now say with pride that I am a fully qualified TEFL tutor specializing in teaching English to young learners as well as Teaching English online and I am also a kids YogaDance teacher, with skills in leading arts & craft sessions too. In a few weeks time I will be a Teen yoga teacher also, I have worked so hard to get to this point in my life and the next step is bringing it all together and being given the opportunity to work abroad. If a language school, summer camp or family retreat centre/studio/tour company in Bulgaria are interested in hiring me please visit my contact page or email me.
I am also interested in working in Cyprus (because I have lived there before), Greece, Spain, Portugal, Thailand, Nepal, Vietnam and Bali.
I am well traveled, please take a look at my TripAdvisor page to see I have bundles of Wanderlust.
Otherwise you can follow me on my facebook page or Instagram.